Weddings can be the best day of a couple’s life. A day you bring your friends and family together to celebrate your love and starting a life together. Unless you are these people. We scoured the internet for some of the worst wedding stories out there, in an attempt to prove that all you need is love, and maybe some luck to get through your happy day.
25. Never Lock Your Knees
I was a groomsman in a wedding for my uncle and his fiancée. I was maybe 14 and pretty nervous. I stood up straight as a board, knees locked apparently. It turns out when you stand up with your knees locked you start a pass out timer.
My timer ran out during the vows, my recently widowed mother was losing her mind, arms flailing wildly in the air as she ran to check on me screaming, “OH MY BABY, MY BABY!” Over and over… the wedding was paused as 10 people rushed to save me…
We still watch it on VHS from time to time, pretty funny these days… my other uncle didn’t put me in the wedding party a couple months later, never found out why.
24. Doth Thee Taketh Thine Man?
One of my oldest friends got married at the Renaissance festival, as is very befitting of her if you know her. I was the Maid of Honor and road-tripped for 2 hours with the rest of the bridal party (maids and groomsmen) split across two cars to the fairgrounds. We were told beforehand that tickets would be waiting for us at the box office and all we had to do was tell them who we were with and we’d be let in. No such tickets existed. Despite being in 2011, only a few people in our group had phones but it mattered little since reception is terrible at the festival. We called and called and called the bride and everyone in her family, but we got no answer even on calls that did go through.
All the festival employees would do is confirm there was a wedding taking place that day, but would not give us the name and refused to even go check to tell the bride that her entire wedding party was stuck outside. We sat outside in the courtyard entrance for about two hours as the time of the ceremony ticked dangerously ever closer. Finally, with about 20 minutes to go, I spotted a white shape storming across the courtyard towards us. It was the bride, in her dress and with rollers in her hair. Somehow word had gotten to her about our predicament and she came to resolve the matter herself. She gave the employees at the gate holy hell over the matter and we were all rushed inside with the thinnest apologies you can imagine from them. On top of all of that, it turned out she had paid for the bridesmaids’ hair and makeup to be professionally applied, something there was now no time for. Half of the bridesmaids showed up with bedhead and no makeup at all and that’s how they entered the ceremony. I managed to put a sloppy, vaguely medieval-looking braid circlet around my head as we walked to the backstage area where the procession was to begin.
Given the location, it was requested the bridal party (men and women) dress in kind. Not the worst thing in the world, really. I was in college at the time and cash was scarce, but given that the bride and I have been friends since age 10 and I was the Maid of Honor, I wanted to make the most of it. I spent $60 on a “deluxe” medieval princess dress from Target (just happened to be around Halloween, so score) with approval from the bride. It wasn’t exactly Game of Thrones quality, but neither did it immediately look like something I bought on the relative cheap.
The rest of the bridal party didn’t put as much effort into it. They too seemed to do their shopping from the grocery store after-Halloween clearance bin and it was a sea of crushed velvet, plastic swords, polyester blends so thin they were see-through, and one pirate costume. A high school production of Macbeth would have looked better.
The ceremony went off alright, even though regular festival-goers kept poking their heads in. At the reception, the groom tried to be funny and smash the cake into the bride’s face and it smeared her lipstick and somehow fell off the spoon and down the front of her dress, inside and out. It left a spot of an…unfortunate shape and color down her bodice that her mom and sister desperately tried to get out.
The whole thing was interesting.
23. Way To Steal The Show, Mom
As we were sitting down to eat, a guest started screaming. The groom’s mother went into cardiac arrest. I called 911. They came and attended to her and as we were outside watching them load her into the ambulance, I heard more screaming. Someone ran out and told me that they had better come back into the venue. I run inside and see my grandfather laying on the floor. I ended up riding with him to the hospital. I think he just fainted from the commotion but we didn’t know that at the time. They took both of them to the same hospital. Doctor look at both of them as they were being wheeled in and remarked, “Must have been one hell of a party.”
22. If It’s Not The Mother In Law, It’s Mother Nature.
We got married during a hurricane, and boy did it really go sideways.
We had no power when I woke up, I had to drive around town to find a place to take a restroom break due to being on well water. This was after a rehearsal dinner consisting of bbq and beer, so it was an urgent matter.
The venue did not have power until about 90 minutes before the ceremony was supposed to start.
Downed trees blocked the road to the venue
A massive 50-foot tree fell on my inlaws roof that morning, we were blessed no one was hurt or worse.
A family member showed up high or something and my brother had to make her leave.
The maid of honor forgot my ring and then froze completely when the pastor asked for it. Another bridesmaid quickly passed one of her rings down the line as a stand in. (It didn’t fit)
During the afterparty at the hotel, my Sister In Law’s date accidentally shot himself in the hand. He had to go to a trauma center in a different state at like 3 in the morning. He’s doing ok now, made a full recovery.
To add to all this, my wife parents are divorced, both remarried, and absolutely do not get along. I think this was the first time all 4 of her parents/step-parents were in the same room in years.
It was stressful beyond belief, but my wife and I will always treasure the memories of that hectic and crazy day. The best part was after the ceremony the storm had cleared and my wife and I watched the beautiful sunset that follows a big storm. It was a perfect metaphor to the start of our life together.
21. Never Judge A Book By Its Cover
Hubs and I got engaged while I was pregnant with our first son (who was unplanned of course). We’re high school sweethearts and also 24 and 25 years old, so the unplanned kid wasn’t the reason for the engagement, but it did speed things up a bit.
We planned to have a nice normal wedding, like everyone else… Buuuuuuttttt…. The state decided to seek child support “for me” because kid #1 was on Medicaid. Didn’t matter that we all lived together and he supported us (I guess they technically aren’t supposed to take child support in that type of living situation, but whatever.)
Well, that’s a stupid waste of money, we thought. We won’t actually get all the money they take from him given back to us, so… We’ll just get married now. We can all go on his insurance and the state can butt out.
So, we planned to elope to a nice park with our closest friends, take some nice pics, and his uncle who is internet ordained (and performs everyone in the family’s marriages) will marry us. It’ll be nice but low key. We’ll take our friends out to Dave and Busters and a few other bars after, and we’ll have a good time.
Sooooo… The day arrives, and we get a call from husband’s uncle. He is having complications from diabetes. He is essentially blind. He cannot read the ceremony, sign any papers, or get to the park.
I spend the whole morning on Craigslist looking for cheap or free ordained ministers who can do the job, because lol, we didn’t budget for a minister obviously and they can be fairly expensive… Especially last minute on a SATURDAY.
So, I find a guy who offers to do it for free, though he normally charges. We just have to go to his house, and he’ll perform the ceremony on his porch. Ok… I guess that works. I look up his address. It’s in a pretty nice part of a nearby city. Cool! He’ll probably have a nice yard that will maybe provide a few great photo ops.
All four of us – hubs, the two besties, and I, load into my jeep and head off to this guy’s house. We start driving through this beautiful neighborhood with huge houses and beautifully landscaped yards and we get excited… Again, thinking that it’ll be just as pretty as the park.
And then the GPS tells us to turn. Into a trailer park.
We pulled up to this guy’s trailer and he’s out front in a dirty wifebeater wrenching on his minivan. He tells us to sit tight, he’ll go clean up and change into nicer clothes and get his wife (who apparently assists him). So, we all walk up on his relatively decent sized wood porch and we wait. Did I mention this dude is massive and also has an eye that looks like an angler fish eye? Oh, and there’s a pitbull in his yard, a tire swing, and a turtle sandbox… For the dog.
Meanwhile, my husband’s best friend whispers “are we really doing this?”
So, he comes back with a nice collared plaid shirt, wife right behind. He was a sweet man, honestly. He married us on his porch, let us take pics (which I edited the dog, swing, and sandbox out of) that turned out surprisingly well, and was all around a super awesome individual.
The trailer park wedding that looked horrifying at first, turned out to be a cherished memory because of the goodwill of that random Craigslist minister and his wife (well, and with the help of Photoshop).
We hit up Dave and Buster’s, and then we went to a bar with fantastic bar food (Tipsy McStagger’s) and had a great time.
20. You Should Just Hire A Professional
My uncle decided that I should run the camera at the wedding since I was the most technically literate out of the family.
What he failed to realize was that I was technically literate because I pressed ALL the buttons to figure out what they do…so his wedding video is a combination of weird zooming, different lighting settings flashing on and off, and parts cutting in and out as I fiddled with other settings.
The last minute of them walking out of the church looked GREAT though once I got everything dialed in.
19. A Series Of Unfortunate Events
Our mothers were competing. They couldn’t stand each other. We had a low-budget marriage and feast, reception and feast were in a bar linked to a sports complex so we’d get discount and stuff. I decorated the place the evening before. Set the tables as I wanted them. My dad was very ill so we left an oxygen tank there too. Day of the wedding: my Significant other wanted to pick me up at my parent’s place. My mum was stressed for all kinds of reasons and yelling constantly. Go to the hairdresser, makeup artist is suuuuuuper late. Okay, things happen, right? Go home, get yelled at. Husband to be is late and comes with THE UGLIEST BOUQUET EVER. But whatever, I love him, let’s do this!
Between the wedding and party there are a few hours to give people the time to check into their B&B and mostly my dad time to rest. We would go and have pictures taken. Originally my Mother In Law would make a buffet but she lives far away (and isn’t the best cook) so I freak and cry ‘EVERYONE WILL HAVE SALMONELLA’ because we got hitched in summer. My parents are poor, can’t stand to see me cry and offer to cover a BBQ as our gift for a select group of people. I agree and Mother In Law is upset (which I get, but I panicked). We agree, Mother In Law will make the cake. She decides after the wedding the cake NEEDS to go to the location, insists no one told her about the hours in between and drives there. Also despite us saying no one will be there. She then calls me repeatedly but my phone is in the car, leaves a slew of messages on my machine so we head there asap.
She yelled at the ‘staff’ which were people doing this to HELP ME FOR FREE. Not only that, the arrangement was wrong in her eyes so she tells people to move set tables around WITHOUT taking the breakable stuff like pretty candlesticks off. My mum bought those. They broke. She gets mad at me. Again.
My Significant other insisted people wouldn’t dance to a playlist. He invited a friend who was a DJ. That played awful odd techno music. He had all sorts of material with him, of which he previously had said he’d not bring much. He arrived with a van full. The circuits of the bar weren’t equipped for that but thankfully they held for the hour awful DJ played. My mum was again upset and went home. A friend earlier had a fight with her boyfriend and had left too. The family I rarely saw was angry when they found out they only were invited for the reception. My dad was on his oxygen tank, super upset that my mum had left, struggling to stay but there for as long as he could.
And the wedding cake tasted stale, looked awful too.
18. Gotta Fear That Lord
It was both the worst and the greatest wedding I ever attended. The couple getting married were friends of ours. They lived together and loved each other, but we’re young and had not planned to get married yet. Her family found out they were living in sin and all hell broke loose. Her family told her that if she didn’t marry him, they would disown her so they decided to get married. At the ceremony as you would imagine, her side was packed with dozens of hardcore Born Again Christians. They all looked identical. Blondest and palest group of people I have ever seen. No one seemed able to crack a smile. To a person, they seemed to truly, truly hate every person on our side of the church.
To be fair, none of our side of the church was happy about the wedding. We all felt they were too young and doing this for the wrong reason, but wanted to support them anyway. Both were well liked by the group. We were also all very young. But a party is a party, right? We essentially all showed up to the church in pretty good spirits either from drinking a wee bit or other fairly innocuous reasons that occurred in the parking lot.
Here’s the most excellent part. The family pastor or whatever you call them arrived and I honestly thought he was about 14. Throughout the ceremony, he kept repeating and repeating in a very serious drawl, “YOU, MUST, FEAR, THE LORD in order to be TRULY happy.” Now, every time this kid made this proclamation, a wave of giggles would erupt from our side of the church and move its way to the back. This caused further glares from the other side of the aisle. He also spent about 15 minutes declaring how they must forget all their current friends and find married ones only, so we were not predisposed to be well behaved.
Throughout the ceremony, this became the mantra for any and all questions/comments. Well, it was a mantra of the group for years, to be honest. “Hey, how you doing haven’t seen you in ages. Yeah hi, how you doing. Great, I FEAR THE LORD HOW BOUT YOU?” “Can I get you a drink? Ah maybe, does it FEAR THE LORD?” It was endless and with more beer became even funnier.
The reception was fantastic. On a beautiful lake with a BBQ. But our side, of course, attacks the lake after more beers. We had a great time and so did the couple, just not her family. The other side was convinced we were all going to die because we were drinking and swimming. Not sure if they were worried or hoping at that point, but no fun was happened on their side for certain.
Fast forward to a year later. The couple is divorcing because the bride has decided she needs to experiment with others. Many, many others including their other roommate. He’s now a very successful scientist with a wonderful family. Not sure what happened to her, but I don’t think good things. Guess she didn’t fear the lord enough.
17. If You Aren’t On The List, You Aren’t Getting In
My mother-in-law invited several people to our wedding, without our knowledge or permission. Luckily my father-in-law told my husband what she’d done, and my husband made her call every single person she’d invited and tell them she’d done it without us knowing and that they couldn’t come. She was furious and kept going on about how it’d make her look bad/stupid if she had to un-invite them, but my husband didn’t care and still made her do it. She didn’t talk to us for a couple of weeks after that.
16. We Have A Winner For “Worst Wedding”
Not my wedding, but went to a lovely wedding in the Mendoza region of Argentina. It was a destination wedding at an amazing, posh and remote winery. Everyone was also staying at the winery in their own cottages.
Around 2am, the DJ and dancing were in full force. Suddenly, 6 masked gunmen stormed the dance floor, ordering everyone onto the ground.
It was chaos. People started scattering, trying to hide in the vineyards. Those who weren’t lucky enough to escape were forced to give over all jewelry, wallets, and purses. This includes the bride and groom, who were stripped of their brand new wedding rings.
The gunmen went to the cottages, taking suitcases. One man was in his room, watching soccer. He fought back and was beaten. By some miracle, they skipped the cottages where the bride’s grandmother was sleeping. As well as the cottage where a pregnant guest was staying.
Thankfully a security guard escaped and called the police. Fearing a hostage situation, they waited until the gunmen loaded everything into the van and drove off. Then they gave chase. The van was abandoned and they left behind all the loot, save the jewelry and money they could carry.
The beaten man ended up in the hospital but was okay. Those who hid in the vineyard didn’t show back up until the morning. Everyone thought they were hurt or worse. In the end, everyone was pretty shell-shocked.
We all took solace that everyone was okay, and it was a fantastic week and wedding. You know, up until the gunmen.
15. Going Above And Beyond The Call Of Duty
I’m a wedding photographer, and at one wedding, the bride went to put on her dress and it didn’t fit (it was a corset back with the flap that pulls across under it, but she had gained weight and the flap didn’t go all the way across her back anymore). Her mom started hysterically yelling at her daughter saying she warned her she was getting fat and should have stopped eating so much. The bride is in tears and mortified. I had to kick the mom out of the room and take control of the situation. Luckily the hotel sheets were a close enough ivory, so we cut a piece from the sheets to use as the fabric under the corset threading and it was passable. I kept the mom away from the poor bride all day.
14. Never Upset The Bride
Some non-members of a country club rented the party room for their wedding. You apparently could walk through the party room to get to the pool, or you could walk an extra 10 steps to get there by going outside. It was summer, so the pool was open.
The wedding posted some people at the door of the party room so when someone would try to cut through, they would be re-directed outside. Most people took this with grace and offered congratulations, except for one very intoxicated man.
He was pissed he couldn’t cut through, but also that those people weren’t members and were using “his” country club. He started to raise a big stink, to the point where the bride’s brothers go over to talk to him. “We’re so excited for our sister, and are sorry we’re making this inconvenient, but would you mind just taking the outdoor path?” and the like. Eventually, the mother of the bride goes over and talks to the guy as well. He’s unrelenting. He pays his dues and as such should be allowed to walk through this party room to the pool.
While he’s talking to the mother, a beer bottle comes flying through the air and drills him in the side of the head. Everyone turns to see the bride, having thrown the bottle, screaming “You’re ruining my wedding!” over and over again.
13. Doomed From The Start
When I was about 12, I was an usher in my older cousin’s wedding. The pastor had a heart attack mid-ceremony and died on the way to the hospital. Everybody waited in the church basement / “Fellowship hall” while my dad gave CPR and waited for the EMTs. After the EMTs left, the assistant pastor finished the ceremony. The marriage did not last more than a few weeks.
12. Seems Like A Bad Omen
My coworker was having her wedding on a public beach in Southern California, they weren’t able to reserve anything, just make do with it the best that they could. Well, right before she was due to walk down the aisle a homeless man stumbles into the group of people guests and passes out midway into the isle. A couple of guys go over to get him to move, but the dude wasn’t waking up. Ended up giving him CPR for a solid 20 minutes while waiting for the ambulance. Didn’t hear anything else about him after they carried him off the beach.
11. What A Rollercoaster
I got into a fist fight, best man threw up during his speech, her dress caught on fire, my uncle announced he was leaving my aunt for a 21 year old, wasted cousin spilled the beans about my sister being pregnant to my very conservative grandma and we all got food poisoning for the caterer.
10. Just Always Assume It Is Going To Rain.
The wedding was at a Hacienda outside the city. A big patio, a pool, and a small kiosk where the ceremony would be officiated. Leading up to the wedding day, the weather had been dry and sunny.
So the day comes and my big family arrives at the hacienda. (We are like 50+ people), plus my brothers and sister-in-law’s friends, we are about 100 or so people.
And then it starts to drizzle.
The ceremony was still being officiated and those who could moved into the kiosk. A small kiosk now housed about 30 people huddled together. The rest just had to get wet.
And then it starts to rain.
All chairs and tables, food and drinks, and the live band had to be rushed inside a small hall. The owners of the place told us the hall was for about 30 people or so, but the crammed all of us inside. The dance floor was a 2×5 meter space that was super slippery.
And then it pours.
The roads flooded. The patio flooded. The hall flooded.
Those who could escape early arrived safe, but 10 minutes later cars were stuck on the flooded roads. Those who didn’t try to leave got stuck until the next day at around 10 am.
One of my brother’s friends slipped on the floor and opened his head at around 9 am the next morning, and everyone who was left at the party accompanied him to the hospital. So there finally the party ended. Everyone’s attire was wet and muddy. Most were barefoot. The guy had a few stitches. But everyone had great fun.
9. The Eye Of The Tiger
My wife’s father was in our wedding party, and around the time the best man was handing the rings to the officiant, father-in-law just falls over. Everyone thought he died, white as a ghost.
Had to call an ambulance for him because he kept passing out when he’d wake up. Several of our wedding pics show my wife and I finishing our vows with his feet laid out in the corner (EMTs were sitting with him – he told us to finish the ceremony).
He wasn’t able to return to the wedding until later that night, but the DJ tossed on Eye of the Tiger for him.
8. Gotta Love A Priest With A Sense Of Humor
I’m a female fencing coach. Three days before the wedding everything was ready, so I went to fencing practice. It was epee night, the heaviest weapon. Target is the entire body. A fencer named Amy and I were going at it and attacked simultaneously, aiming for the arms. Slammed into each other. I got a massive bruise, couple of inches in diameter, on my right bicep.
Of course, my wedding dress was strapless. The makeup person practically had a heart attack tracking down enough concealer. The priest took one look at my arm and said, “Well, that takes care of the ‘something blue.'”
7. What Is It With Mother-In-Laws?
My mother-in-law accidentally on purpose destroyed our favor boxes. Our photographer had a stroke before the wedding but assured us she would still come and take pictures; she came, but without her camera. Our cat peed on my wife’s wedding gown then ran away the night before the wedding, forcing the bridesmaids to hunt through the neighborhood at night for it. The wedding cake was disgusting and in the wrong colors. The restaurant that was to host our rehearsal dinner canceled at the last minute, leaving us to cram 50-some people in the kitchen area of a local seafood place (they were extremely kind and accommodating). The mother and father of the bride showed up ten minutes before the wedding, not even dressed, wanting us to help them get ready. And for good measure, on our honeymoon, we had the license plate stolen off our car.
Happily married ten years now.
6. Always Save Your Recipes
I was pregnant, mother in law decided we should get married- we had been engaged for more than two years at that point, so I was like what the hell, might as well. I kept my guest list to an absolute minimum; closest family, best friend and other best friend’s parents because that best friend was out of the country. My husband to be knew everyone I invited. I, on the other hand, got introduced to people at my wedding and I’ve never seen them since. Got through the vows and the food was brought out immediately. No speechless, no first dance- no dancing at all in fact- people basically ate and left. Our wedding cake was stolen too. At least we got to cut the cake. And to top it off, the person who made the cake used the recipe for the first time – she was skilled enough to risk it – and she couldn’t find the recipe after that. The bite that I had was amazing!
5. The Audacity
I live in England. There was no tea!!!
4. It’s Called RSVP For A Reason
70 more guest showed up than were invited. Turns out MIL was inviting people and not telling us. We ran out of chairs, food, everything. Except for wine, we had plenty of that.
Someone stole the wedding gifts.
3. Low-Key Sounds A Lot Like Loki.
Very small, low-key backyard wedding, so what could go wrong?
I managed to lose my handwritten vows and had to re-write them right before, the caterers didn’t deliver half the food, our rings weren’t ready so we had to use decoys, my father interrupted me in the middle of my vows, crazy wasted aunt tried to burn my dress with a flaming stick, there was an awkward shouting match about abortion while we were trying to cut the cake, there was a small brawl towards the end of the night, and none of the pictures turned out well except a surprisingly nicely framed shot of the brawl.
So, pretty much a normal gathering for my side of the family.
2. Well, That Escalated Quickly
The father of the bride and his brother get wasted, nothing out of the ordinary and they are harmless drinkers but can get a little mouthy. A fight breaks out and the cops come and of all the people they arrest it’s the dad and the uncle. As I said, they are harmless but mouthy and the local cops didn’t like being called names so they beat the hell out of them. The uncle was a cop from the neighboring city and protocol is if a cop is arrested the arrested guys department has to come pick them up. So, the police show up to get their wasted comrade and see that he’s been “tuned up” and that doesn’t go over very well and guns are drawn and words are exchanged but nobody is hurt. This goes to court and the judge’s only statement is, there’s a fight of 50 people and the only two you arrest is the father of the bride and his brother!? Case dismissed. But that wasn’t the end of it because they still had to deal with the local PD beating up a cop and his brother. Sadly, the blue wall was in full effect and the uncle/cop wouldn’t testify against the guys who beat him up. The bride and groom had a great time and didn’t know anyone went to jail until after the reception.
1. Read The Room, Dude
So my cousin recently got married to his long-term partner and the actual wedding itself went really well.
The reception directly after the ceremony, however, was marred somewhat by the bride’s parents announcing halfway through the night and completely out of the blue that they would be divorcing.